To preserve the integrity and the colour of this report there has been no corrections to the spelling or grammar. This will also be the process in the future to protect the artistic flair of this column. Powernews proundly presents the 'Impimpi Of Pretoria' - THE BLOND PIMPERNEL (Click on the picture for enlargement)
Joburg’s finest vs. Miriam
A very warm welcome to all you nosy ones, supporting the art of social information distribution. Today I would like to tell Miriam’s story. It’s a touching tale of adversity and raw human sincerity.
Our fellow perm consultant Miriam had a run in (literally) with a specimen of one Joeys finest – a Taxi driver called Simon. Upon investigation I found out that both parties concur that the incident occurred, on Monday morning the 25th of June 2007 around 7:26, on the corner of somewhere and somewhere near the William Nicol off ramp. This is where Simon and Miriam met for the first time – the scene where they sort of crashed into each other. (Obviously, not to be bias or anything, we are on Miriam’s side and she’s okay by the way).
Now I want to also tell everyone that I have in fact called Simon to get his side of the story, so that the information I disclose here would be as close to the truth as anyone would ever get!
Wait till you guys read his side of the story, and I’m not kidding at all! All he gave me was a one-liner, but a real classic one if you ask me! When I called him to “enquire” about the role he played in making our colleague’s car look like a McDonalds happy meal, he politely informed me that he couldn’t talk to me for long because he was driving (speeding is more like it) without a hands free kit (and have you ever seen a taxi-driver with a hands free kit?) so anyway…
Here are both sides of the story word for word:
Miriam’s side: “It’s very simple, I was in the slow lane, going towards the William Nicol off ramp and the bugger cut in in front of me and I slammed on breaks, there was no space for me to stop so I drove into him.”
Simon’s side: “I drive a taxi, she should know by now”
So there you have it. Moral of the story: Expect the expected.
A very warm welcome to all you nosy ones, supporting the art of social information distribution. Today I would like to tell Miriam’s story. It’s a touching tale of adversity and raw human sincerity.
Our fellow perm consultant Miriam had a run in (literally) with a specimen of one Joeys finest – a Taxi driver called Simon. Upon investigation I found out that both parties concur that the incident occurred, on Monday morning the 25th of June 2007 around 7:26, on the corner of somewhere and somewhere near the William Nicol off ramp. This is where Simon and Miriam met for the first time – the scene where they sort of crashed into each other. (Obviously, not to be bias or anything, we are on Miriam’s side and she’s okay by the way).
Now I want to also tell everyone that I have in fact called Simon to get his side of the story, so that the information I disclose here would be as close to the truth as anyone would ever get!
Wait till you guys read his side of the story, and I’m not kidding at all! All he gave me was a one-liner, but a real classic one if you ask me! When I called him to “enquire” about the role he played in making our colleague’s car look like a McDonalds happy meal, he politely informed me that he couldn’t talk to me for long because he was driving (speeding is more like it) without a hands free kit (and have you ever seen a taxi-driver with a hands free kit?) so anyway…
Here are both sides of the story word for word:
Miriam’s side: “It’s very simple, I was in the slow lane, going towards the William Nicol off ramp and the bugger cut in in front of me and I slammed on breaks, there was no space for me to stop so I drove into him.”
Simon’s side: “I drive a taxi, she should know by now”
So there you have it. Moral of the story: Expect the expected.
3 comments:
All we ever got to read were long and boring stories, until Bryanston Office Support to a stand and decided to change that...
This is the best story ever - goes to show that Bryanston Office Support has a lot to offer to Manpower Blog.
Keep it up guys!!!
Hey Miriam - I feel your pain. You should try driving in Berea Road in Durbs. These hell-drivers are all over you - going through red traffic lights etc. The only thing that is consistent with them is the speed with which they travel. No wonder that in Umlazi they call a taxi ZOLA BUDD. Why? Cause she runs so fast! Haikona!
Halala - da cat is among da pigeons - a spy among the spinnerkoppe!
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